the invisible majority and the PC exclusion factor

When I was 15, a stunning article in Allure magazine introduced me to luminaries Veronica Monet, Tracy Quan and the irrepressible Norma Jean Almodovar. All three women talked about sex worker rights and changing the law. That article was the only bright spot in the next eight years of reading about sex workers.

By the time I began stripping, I knew what a sex worker activist was: a lesbian vegan living in San Francisco who didn’t shave (let alone wax) and was often very overweight. She had a useless degree in philosophy or women’s studies from Berkeley (unlike my highly-useful photography degree!). Sex worker activists were overly-represented in my readings about sex work and they never, ever described me or any other strippers that I knew. I remember emailing Jill Nagle and complaining that Whores and Other Feminists was not representative of all sex workers, I wanted stories from sex workers who looked and sounded like me and my co-workers, workers who walked in our shoes too. I never heard back from her.

Maybe because I and the sex workers I knew looked mainstream. Veronica Monet and Tracy Quan were the only two public sex workers who looked normal to me (I did not find other interviews with Norma Jean, sadly). I was so happy to discover the books of Dolores French, Lily Burana and Heidi Mattson because I could identify with them, though Lily and Heidi weren’t “activists.”

Everything I read told me activists discounted you if you looked mainstream sexy, as though they believed a sex worker with implants or blonde hair has nothing of value to add (just like everyone else in society).

There is a deep prejudice permeating the sex worker rights movement in the US. Just because some of us have a mainstream appearance doesn’t mean we don’t deal with the same stigma that every other sex worker does, that we somehow work under a different set of laws. Just because we look much like the “pretty” depictions of sex workers in mainstream media doesn’t mean we’re not “real,” it means we’re making money (most sex workers are in sex work to make money). Does the movement think that because mainstream media depicts a certain look that it’s somehow representing or speaking for those who have that look?

Just because we’re hetero doesn’t mean our sexuality should be ignored or dismissed — it’s as meaningful to us as it is to LGBTs. Whore Stigma is based on fear and hatred of female sexuality in any form. Just because we’re female doesn’t mean our “female-centric” views should be automatically discounted. Women have made up the vast majority of sex workers ever since women were invented. The majority of the issues sex workers face are parallel with women’s issues, and sometimes parallel with issues confronting those who identify as women.

“Inclusiveness” and “diversity” are such huge preoccupations in the movement that they often derail energy and focus on the real-world issues staring all of us in the face. In the stampede to be inclusive and make sure that all ethnic/gender/occupation/whatever boxes are ticked and that a token representative is present, a huge majority go unnoticed and unwelcome. Many in the movement seem to think that because a certain type of sex worker are a majority, that somehow their concerns are being met or they don’t face serious, often universal, issues. Because they are a natural majority, they are punished by being given no voice.

Read more

desiree alliance 2010 — register today!

Today is the last day to register for the Desiree Alliance 2010 conference. If you want to come to and melt with us in Las Vegas for a week you won’t forget — register now!

Sex workers and allies are welcome. If you’re an ally, you will have to give a bit more detailed explanation of your interest. Genuine supporters are very welcome. I know a couple of blog readers have already registered and I can’t wait to meet ya’ll!

Here’s what you’re going to get:
Dr. Joycelyn Elders
Norma Jean Almodovar (personal hero of mine)
Nina Hartley
Dr. Brooke Magnanti (yes, her)
the one and only Robyn Few
Carol Leigh
plenty of other industry luminaries
Vegas Vegas Vegas
the most amazing people you’ll meet having the time of their lives
lots of love, support, acceptance

You’ll leave with:
tears in your eyes
100+ new best friends
a head full of ideas for business and life

More of the details:
Registration Fee = $250
Student Fee = $200 (Must provide proof of enrollment for school (student ID)

Registration fees for the conference include: Attendance at any or all of the workshops, presentations and sessions; name badge and registration packet; Welcome Reception with cocktails and hors d’oeuvres (July 25, 6pm); Continental breakfast (July 26-29); Lunch (July 27 & 29); Farewell Brunch with keynote speaker (July 30); and a significant discount on lodging (please note that this location will not be disclosed until registration is complete). You can make the lodging discount more significant by room-sharing.

Registration fees do NOT include: transportation; lodging; lunch on July 26 and 28, dinner; Fundraiser After Party (you will have the option of purchasing a ticket during registration); dinners, souvenirs, extra-curricular activities or personal expenses.

Please note: If financial trouble is the obstacle that stands in your way of attending this conference, please contact Susan Lopez at Desiree Alliance is more than happy to think “out-of-the-box” in terms of finding ways to help those who would be able to volunteer their time in exchange for partial deductions (i.e. registration fee or a possible room-share arrangement so that the cost would be $12.50 per night plus tax and fees).

Needless to say, if you want to support but don’t want to go (or can’t), then donations are always welcome. Donations will go to helping others get to the conference and paying for the conference facilities.

desiree alliance conference 2010

Registration is now open for the Desiree Alliance 2010 Conference! I’m so excited! Yes, I’ll be there. No, I don’t plan on presenting. I want to enjoy the full week. (Though I’ll no doubt be doing some on-site volunteering and I’m already doing behind-the-scenes planning work.)

We’re looking to put together an amazing program for everyone who attends, so if you think you might want to present on a range of topics, please submit a proposal! We have 5 different tracks: Academia, Activism/Leadership, Business Development, Arts/Media, Harm Reduction.

I toured the grounds of the conference shortly before I left the States and it’s ideal for everyone. The room rate is great and I’ve already booked my room. It’s going to be very budget-friendly this year too. (Yes, there’s a pool. It’s Vegas in July. Bring sunscreen too.)

Yes, you have to register in advance. Yes, we are screening. This has to be a safe space so the general public just can’t wander in. That being said, you don’t have to be a sex worker to attend. Allies and supporters are always welcome. And no, you don’t have to live in the US to be welcome either.

If you’re not interested in attending but still want to help out, you can always volunteer your time (behind the scenes), services (like printing programs) or just a plain old financial support always helps. DA always offers scholarships ever year so sex workers who are on tight budgets can attend and have their expenses covered. The more money we can raise, the more scholarships can be awarded.

It’s always about networking, learning, making new friends and just seeing friends you haven’t seen in a year! It’s something sex workers in the US rarely get. It’s going to be so great this year!