Posted on by Amanda Brooks

bits and pieces 5

— One of the tracking services I use for my book’s site gets some hits for odd search phrases. I only read the summary and do not log into the control panel to see if there was more than one hit (one hit is enough to go in my stats, of course).

For the person who wants to know if putting in a tampon is like having sex — no, it isn’t.

Here are a few suggestions for the person who wanted some “tips when ordering an escort.”

When ordering an escort, make sure the delivery service wraps her up in a foil blanket so she stays warm on the ride over and will be hot and fresh at your door. Make sure she’s made up of only the bits you like best, no sense in throwing in some extra intelligence if you always ignore it anyway! Always ask for extra cheese or sauce, you never know, the kitchen might be in the mood to throw that in. Tip the delivery person if the escort arrives early. Don’t bother to tip the escort — that’s just silly! Always have your coins counted out in advance, no one likes to wait at the door while you pull pennies out of the change jar. Make sure the escort ordering service offers a “30 minutes or it’s free” guarantee just like every other pizza kitchen in town (since a pizza and escort are exactly the same thing, of course). Most importantly, make sure to announce you’re using a coupon when placing your order! Coupons can usually be found in the local papers.

On the other hand, maybe the person wanted to know how to order an escort to do something. Good luck with that, pal.

— I went over to Europe with a set of photos that showed a lot of personality, not a lot of skin. I liked them, US guys liked them, but they didn’t impress many over there. I resolved to do ultra-sexy (for me, at any rate) when I got back. So I did. Irony of ironies, these new photos are generally too sexy for US advertisers working around 2257. So I can’t use many of the ones I’d like to. (Obviously this one has been sitting around for a while in the Drafts folder.)

— Did you know that Angelina Jolie, Eva Mendes and I are all way over the hill for highly-discriminating escort agencies? (At least according to their stated hiring policies.) I did find one agency in London for whom we’re all almost 20yrs too young — which was refreshing.

Posted on by Amanda Brooks

virtual seeping into real life

I was hoping not to feel the need to address this on any blog but that has changed. For those of you not deeply involved in the online escort community, the furor is over Alexa DiCarlo and her degree of “realness” . She’s a prolific blogger/Tweeter (among other things) and generally spends a lot of time online and active. She’s developed a huge following, mostly mainstream, though every sex worker I know reads her blog or Tweets or is familiar with them.

She and I have corresponded for about two years, if not slightly longer (would have to check but the real info is on my desktop currently in storage). We have written a couple times about this “faux ho” incident. Nothing I say here isn’t anything I haven’t already said to her. No, I have never met her. All our contact has been of the virtual kind.

I have questions I feel are unanswered. Though I have heard questions about who she is for over a year, I didn’t feel that asking her via email would solve anything. I did not think a public airing was the way to get answers either. But it was done. Indeed, what should have been just a discussion — a chance for everyone to say their piece and ask questions — has turned very ugly and non-sex workers feel that sex workers are turning against each other because of the hideous ripple effect happening online. Apparently, some have been moved to make physical threats against her (and her loved ones). This is crossing a major line. Threats solve nothing and I certainly do not support this treatment of Alexa. (That these threats probably can’t be carried out is irrelevant to me. There is no need for threats, period.)

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