The “random” part of the “random discourse.”
— The Cleveland Courage Fund has raised more than $1 million and it’s all thanks to everyone who has donated. Amanda Berry, Gina DeJesus, and Michelle Knight thank supporters in a video.
— I keep thinking George Zimmerman and Ezekiel Gilbert look alike even though they really don’t.
Yet another call for donations. No, this blog isn’t going to turn into that. But sometimes things happen that move me and I know that many readers have good hearts. It never matters how much you give because I know those in need appreciate every dollar; but it does matter what happens to your hard-earned money.
My friend Jill and I have discussed the Ohio women every day since the news broke. We’ve wanted to help but didn’t want our money to go anywhere but directly to the victims. Jill feels she has found a way to donate that will help the women the most. I’ll let her explain why this matters so much to Gina, Amanda, Michelle.
I’m Jill Brenneman. Amanda graciously asked me to do a guest post on her blog about donations for the Cleveland kidnapping victims. I want to express why it is very important that anyone who can donate does so, because while they are now free from Ariel Castro, their recovery will be a lifetime process.
Donations are being processed by the Cleveland Foundation. While there appears to be more than one donation website, the Cleveland Foundation is the only site that states it will be giving 100 percent of the proceeds to the victims.
My post will refer a great deal to my own life experiences after being held captive for three years until I escaped. It is imperative to me that my purpose is understood: I am using my experiences to illustrate what life is like once one has escaped because there is little information or discussion about it. While much of this discussion is about me and my experiences, the post is about why the three kidnapping victims need our help. While I appreciate whatever concern may be felt about me by those who read this post, I would ask that you please focus on the purpose of the post: Gina DeJesus, Michelle Knight, and Amanda Berry need our help. They are the focus of this post. My experiences are only to illustrate the reasons why a former captive needs immediate assistance. This post is about the three women in Cleveland. Not about me.
I was a kidnapping victim in circumstance similar to Gina DeJesus, Michelle Knight, and Amanda Berry. I was fortunate to escape after three years. Nonetheless, escaping a captor isn’t even a halfway point to recovery. For three years I was tortured, raped, endured sensory deprivation, placed in restraints that kept me in stress positions for long durations of time, malnourished, and had absolutely no control over any part of my life. Life for me as a captive was always cause and effect — usually with violent consequences. Even involving things I had no control over; for example, bruising from a vicious beating was cause for punishment. I was expected to address basic bodily needs once a day when he came to take me to the bathroom. Anything beyond that was automatically grounds for punishment because it was seen as defiance. This has profoundly impacted my life even though I escaped nearly thirty years ago.
This might become an ongoing series as I remember stuff or things occur to me.
— I regret forgetting my walking shoes one recent weekend and having to wear heels more than I’d planned, which caused a foot sprain a couple days later when I returned home.
— I regret giving my real phone number to a Las Vegas strip club for the one or two nights I worked there in 2008. I still have that phone and have gotten text messages from them a few times a week. Since 2008. I wish they would purge their “inactive hires” list. Advice to anyone: treat strip club managers like customers and never give out your real phone number. Granted, I’m obviously a little slow on the uptake. Never had a problem with Dallas clubs texting me for the rest of my natural life, but that was years before. Damn technology.
— I regret not having professional photos taken of me during my stripper years. I had a great body. I also regret not being an international touring stripper. Would have been a blast.
— I regret letting relationships get in the way of my work; the reason I didn’t become an international touring stripper, the reason for my retirement in 2004, and the reason behind other decisions. Something I’ve learned in my 30s is to just say no to being squished by a relationship.
— I often regret being so damn “different” as an escort but that one’s not a full-on regret as there have been a lot of good things about being me. However, when I give advice to others, I always give it on the assumption that they do not want to make the mistakes I have.
— I regret my terrible, trashy taste in fiction. I read a lot of the classics when I was younger and I regret not reading more because my current love of brainless, non-redeeming fiction is embarrassing. (My taste in non-fiction is upright and not embarrassing.)
— I regret buying cute handsoaps with little plastic animals embedded in the soap because as the soap washes away, the hard pointy edges of the animals emerge and every washing is painful but it takes a lot of washing to be able to pull the animals out of the soap.
— I regret not speaking my mind when I really should.
— I regret my lack of time-management skills and how it’s gotten worse, not better, over the years.
— I don’t regret not getting a boob job.
Last week was a bad week for the US. As a runner, I’m still coming to grips with the attack on the Boston Marathon and the idea that some of the runners have lost their legs. So far, no reports of any barefoot runners being injured. Not that running shoes protect against a bomb.
I would like to donate to any personal family fund for victims without health insurance. For now, it seems like this is going to be the best place to donate: The One Fund. Sporty types can buy a t-shirt.
As a Texan, I’ve been saddened by the explosion in West. A friend and I were sitting on my couch, watching a movie and we felt it. We’be both been through earthquakes and thought it was an earthquake, one that lasted only 1-2 seconds. It wasn’t until the next day that I realized the time of the blast and what we felt.
The people of West have lost a lot. There are already donation cans set up near cash registers around Texas. For direct donations, this article suggests donating through the Salvation Army, Wells Fargo, Red Cross, or direct donations to the local banks specified in the article.
Anyone is welcome to post links to family donation websites. I know that it’s usually months after a tragedy that the the real cost comes to light for everyone involved.
I’ve been blogging here since 2005. I’ve enjoyed it and enjoyed the commenters who have come and gone (there are several whom I miss and hope they’re at least lurking). People have noticed that I’ve been fairly silent here since 2011. Coming back to the States was a bit of a shock and once re-acclimated, I began focusing more on my personal life and building my company. Or maybe I just find the States boring.
The company is moving forward, slowly, which is the normal speed for it. But exciting things are on the way: a new ebook, more blogging, a collaboration with a new author, reprinting Book 1. Seeing my baby growing makes me very happy. Makes for dull blogging though at some point I will do a series on self-publishing for sex workers.
Escort work is still fun but certainly not where the majority of my time and energy are directed. Mostly I’ve just been living my own life. Again, this makes for dull blogging. There are news bits and plenty of things that interest me sex work-wise but mostly…I’ve said a lot of what I want to say on relevant issues. Those poor horses are good and dead by now. Continuing to drum away is repeating myself and I hate doing that.
Continue to stick around for the random bits, a few rants, some thought pieces (my favorites). Not sure where this blog is going but it will continue to go and find its own way, as always. It still won’t ever become a sex blog or client expose. It will always be an atypical escort blog. So if that’s your thing, have patience.