Someone (possibly a retired escort?) has finally figured it out. You can have the best pen-pal of all, for a fee, of course. Just like the guys who constantly write escorts without ever setting up an appointment, you will never meet your fake Internet girlfriend. Plans start at $250/month and go up depending on amount of contact required (sounds familiar). Seems to be the real deal, though I do wonder just how many different people are actually in the talent pool and if they are all actually females (it’s pretty easy to fool guys online).

Personally, I’m waiting for FakeHooker.com to debut. Oh wait, nevermind.

7 thoughts on “where pen-pals should go

  1. Dear Ms. Brooks:
    I was wondering how often would you get this harassment? Also what is the nature and scope of the conversations and would you have other colleagues that would be experiencing similar harassment in prose? Also is there certain questions that are asked that are indicators that the person will never book for a variety of reasons? Also at what point in the verification process would you receive these inquries?

  2. Lionel — At this point, I’m going to assume you’re just joking in some manner. Persist in this vein and I will block you. Will be my first block in three years. If you wish to truly comment on the subject or make real conversation, then do so.

  3. Lionel- There was no need to change your last name. We all know it’s you.

    Amanda- This looks interesting. I looked at the information on their Now Hiring! page and it looks like a lot of work for only $10/hr. Furthermore, they write:

    “Online gaming experience a plus. Please let us know if you have ever played WoW, Evequest or Evony.”

    Well. I think we know who their main audience will be! I’m going to ask around to see if this company has tried to post on any of the message boards that gamers use. They claim to have had incredible success so somebody I know in the gaming community should have heard of them by now. The pictures are extremely artistic but I guess they’re trying to avoid making it look like a second-rate Maxim layout, which itself resembles a second-rate online phone sex hotline.

  4. Would be nice if it did attract and keep the attention of the time wasters. That way everyone would win. I don’t think that way, so is it really a viable business? Could well be that there could be males in the talent pool. Seems likely that they would be attracting the same type of people to work for them that they want as customers. Each to their own.

  5. Aspasia — Yes, since we know what pen-pals are like, $10/hr doesn’t cut it.

    “Well. I think we know who their main audience will be! I’m going to ask around to see if this company has tried to post on any of the message boards that gamers use.”

    Good idea! Report back, I’m curious.

    “I guess they’re trying to avoid making it look like a second-rate Maxim layout, which itself resembles a second-rate online phone sex hotline.”

    Ha!!!

    David — Yet he’ll probably magically discover the time to go over his $250 allotment of attention.

    Michael — It would be nice, wouldn’t it? Everyone would get what they desire, but the world never works like that.

    Could be viable but the rates would have to be higher. These guys are going to be time-intensive because they have a lot of free time. (Thinking about the rates, maybe it IS run by guys — girls would probably charge more for the hassle.)

    “Seems likely that they would be attracting the same type of people to work for them that they want as customers.”

    Ha! Very good point. That’s rich.

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