As some of you may, or likely not, have noticed; things are changing around here and my book’s website. Thank you, SESTA/FOSTA, for that.
One thing that is very different with the book’s site redesign is that the book’s companion blog, The Notebook, is gone. I published there from 2006-2015. I have no idea how many people actually read it, or not. In fact, I had the impression that it was outdated and full of shit.
Not true! I’ve gathered the posts, tossed the ones that weren’t authored by me and that aren’t relevant to readers now, updated links, updated many of the postings with new information, added new material that hasn’t been published before. I’m creating an ebook out of the posts and expect it to be selling before the end of December.
Rereading every single one of my posts was invigorating. My writing is far more relevant and info-packed than I thought, and nowhere near icky and cringey to read. In fact, the writing is quite good. When looking for additional material to include, I stumbled across my forgotten file of escort writing and realized I’ve been researching and writing about online escort work for 16 years. I have plenty of material, never-before-seen, that will be made into a second ebook in the spring.
Anything that is dated is updated, but honestly, very little of the basic concepts of this have changed in the intervening years. The legal and advertising landscape has changed, the reality of the job has not. It’s an exciting project.
No, it’s not Books 3 and 4, but it’s sort of a sideways companion, covering a lot of the topics I planned to cover (just not in exhaustive detail). Nor do either of these books stand on their own as a complete escort education, they’re complements to Books 1 and 2. They’re additional info, additional tips, additional lessons learned by yours truly. They answer a lot of questions escorts have that aren’t covered in the two big books.
And…surprisingly, I wrote to a broader audience than I realized and I’m hoping to appeal to civvie readers, especially with the attention drawn to online sex work due to trafficking hysteria. I answered so many issues so many years prior. The issues never change.
I’m going to sell exclusively through Amazon, at least at first, because I want to experiment with different price points and their Kindle Select program. These two extra books will not be made into print books. I’m looking to make life easy on myself, for once. (I’m aware of print-on-demand but I hate the lack of absolute control and the low profit margins.)
And after these two books are out? I’m likely going to exit stage right. Thank you all and goodnight.
Update 12/29: It’s already on Amazon!! A little early.
I had nothing more than your two books to help me get started in this industry at the age of 50. I am forever grateful. I don’t read e-books for several reasons, but have amassed an impressive library of books about escorting, sex and sex workers advocacy over the nine years I’ve been in this profession. So I hope you will reconsider publishing hard copies of books 3 and 4. I really would like to read them and add them to the library.
My goal now is to establish an academy that provides a year-long training and education center for people interested in working in the industry. I have seen many people who wanted to succeed in this line of work fail in the first year. I worked in technical and demanding professions prior to this, but they pale in comparison to escorting because it involves not only professional aptitude and experience, but is a catalyst for private personal development too.
Of course, there’s the trafficking hysteria thing to overcome first. It’s unfortunate that legislators do not do their homework or research the accurate academic work on sex work that’s out there instead of believing whatever they are told. Why can’t they see that criminalization equals state-sanctioned discrimination? We are not victims, we are an economic powerhouse. And we will prevail.
All life’s best to you and yours Amanda. From one of your minions, Beatrix
Beatrix — Hi! Thank you and you’re very welcome! So glad I could help.
I have a wonderful sex work library too, and it’s all in storage right now. As long as bugs haven’t eaten it…I look forward to enjoying it again one day.
Books 3 and 4 won’t be published. What I’m publishing in the coming months is different. Similar, but different. And…likely not going to be paper published. I could change my mind at some point, I know well that sex workers are a real-book loving people. Print publishing (done right) is a more time-intensive and expensive process for the publisher. At the moment, I’m looking to make things easier on myself. Again, looking into newer options could change my mind as I haven’t kept up with all technological changes for print books. I honestly would like to have my own print books myself (my own copies of my own books are marked up).
You idea for your training academy is correct. It’s not all business or sex, but how it affects the worker and their lives. No other job fully prepares one for this work and it’s not work for everyone. And yeah, you certainly can’t open your school in this legal climate. It’s terrible. I’m not sure what will be the catalyst for change because I know it’s not political party. It is us, sex workers, but driving us more underground is frightening and makes being public more difficult. The activists of the next couple decades have a huge fight on their hands.
One hopes common sense will prevail, like it has in most Western countries. America has to back away from seeing religion as the answer and go with facts/science (as the facts are clearly on the side of decriminalization).
All the best to you too!!! 🙂
Sex workers are the nicest people in the world!! (Can’t be said too often)
Hi Amanda, I look forward to reading the books too. Hope all is well with you.
Lee — Thank you! And…awwwwww!!!
Things are going well, yes. It’s good. Nice change of pace.
I’m so glad to hear you’ll be publishing another book! Your writing (including blog, to which I’ve been subscribed for years) has been instrumental in my professional success, and has also enhanced my personal life in uncountable ways. Thank you so much for your work, I’m looking forward to reading or rereading anything you choose to release.
Lorelei — Thank you!!!
I’m hoping my updated book blog, plus new pieces, gives you some more information and new food for thought. There’s a lot in there I forgot I ever wrote and was surprised at how well it stood the test of time (and changing laws). It’s practically a guide in and of itself!
My other hope is that it can attract civvies to maybe understand us a little better and realize that the sex trafficking hysteria does not make our lives any better.
Amanda, I stumbled upon you some ten years ago when I was active for sexworkers’ rights somewhere iin Europe.
I’m very grateful to you for sharing your thoughts and insights. It has changed my thinking and attitude deeply. I see some very sharp and unconventional thinking, that is born out of or at least enhanced by a life at the edge of society.
It seems to be a kind of permanent semi-emergency situation, which lifts you way above normal mediocracy.
I not sure, that it’s always comfortable, but you really contribute some value to the world.
Down to earth, I would like the new book in epub format for download or as print edition. I use Amazon Kindle myself but would prefer this book not to be dependent on Amazon’s grace. It’s too important.
All the very best!
Jay — Thank you for the kind words!!
My thinking has always been unconventional, which is an obvious motivation for being a sex worker.
There are times when my life and work has been more about survival than anything else and that indeed puts things into a different perspective. It is not a fun place to linger, though. The sex workers who live years in that state have even more hard-earned insight than I do.
I keep getting requests about it being printed so…it likely will be, just not tomorrow. No, I don’t like it being dependent on Amazon but due to the laws in the US, all of my books will only be sold through third-parties from now on.
Amanda,
Well I went through books 1 and 2, thrice. Great information. At present I am helping a friend become an independent this April, she having worked for agencies until now, both terrible and okay.
But much to my chagrin the one I really wanted most was Book 3 with its promised insights into the business end of things. Book 4 would also have been helpful for our relationship.
Is that something you plan to expand on in future?
Thank you.
Best,
Web
Web — Thank you for being a reader and passing it on!!
No, I’m not likely going to write Books 3 and 4. Really, really not likely. However, if you look at the TOC of The Escort’s Notebook, you might find a lot of topics of interest. And one of my planned books (before I go) will also cover a lot of these topics, though not in the pointed, organized fashion outlined for Books 3 & 4.
I agree with the recent hysteria surrounding Fosta /Festa. I doubt it will make a difference in the long run but many US ladies are policing themselves out by removing their links pages! So in effect they won’t be visible in google.
I just came across your blog and will spend a little while reading through your articles. Thank you for writing.
Adela — Thanks so much for stopping by! Hope you find more you like.
The self-policing is understandable, even though it sucks. Most of us can’t afford a fight with the feds, nor wish to get involved. This business won’t stop but it will change.
Dear Amanda
I have read most of your blog, including many historical entries, over the past few weeks. I am astounded, not to say shocked, by your story. I have also gained many insights and learned many precious lessons that I am eager to absorb, and hope will make me a better, more rounded human being over time. I am writing to you to say thank you. Thank you for sharing your story and thank you for the candour with which you discuss many sensitive and delicate topics.
The first thing I gained, maybe not surprisingly, is a completely new perspective on sex workers and sex work. I am not sure I previously understood the agency of sex workers, that is, to what extent for many such a career is a free choice. I now also truly believe that sex work is a force for good in the world. The world would really be a better place – and both men and women would be happier – if sexuality were considered a natural activity that should be regularly engaged in. Further, that sex workers are, and are bound to be, a natural part of such a better world. Isn’t that a beautiful saying: “Women civilise men, and men build civilisation”? So true, thank you again. We both need each other. And we both grow with the sexual experience, which is the primordial way men and women get to know each other. Decriminalization of sex work is only a first step. Social acceptance of sex work and social integration of sex workers have to be the long-term objectives.
Secondly, I am profoundly disturbed by the story of your accident and its aftermath. Is this really something that can happen in America? It is beyond comprehension. How wicked and malicious can people be? How incompetent can healthcare providers be? How can victims so utterly lack civil rights? My heart is crying. I sincerely hope you will find your equilibrium again, and as much as possible your former self. Do deserve no less. You are a wonderful person. I truly think you have reached a level of maturity and knowledge of yourself, and life, that only very few have. Thank you again for sharing your insights and give the chance to others of progressing in life.
I’m afraid that what I can do is much less. I will endeavour to counter stereotypes of sex workers whenever I can. I will try speaking when people demean your profession. I owe you no less.
With my very best wishes for your future
Thomas
Thomas — Thank you for your kinds words, but most especially for being willing to read and hear what I’ve been saying! That’s the most important thing, to me.
Ideally, yes, sex and sex work are mutually beneficial to the participants and society at large. I think we have a very long way to go, however. Many sex workers are ready and willing to do their part, it’s society that is not and actively engages in oppression.
From what I’ve seen in my travels, decriminalization helps erase stigma much more quickly than anything else. Not all the way, but I imagine that a few generations from now, the stigma in continuously decriminalized areas will be down to almost nothing. I feel like the world, as a whole, is becoming more aware of injustices and wanting to right wrongs. Doesn’t mean that backwards-thinking people aren’t vocal and powerful, but I feel they’re slowly becoming a minority.
Thank you for your kind thoughts around the plane crash. It’s changed me, yes. It all happened, and more that I haven’t publicly mentioned. My life has moved forward, fortunately; something that didn’t feel possible when I wrote that piece. I’m not the person I was before the crash, or even during it, nor will it ever be forgotten. It was a mark in my life: Before Plane Crash, After Plane Crash. Nor am I speaking for Jill right now, who is still dealing with the effects from it more than I am.
Thank you again for your kind wishes. I hope you feel like reading one of my books (or all of them!). I do hope you speak up for sex workers and let people know we’re neither all victims nor all a plague on society, that we’re just people doing a job. We’re people who know our job better than those who haven’t done it. They need to listen to us and drop their preconceived notions. Help them do that! 🙂
Hello Amanda.
Once again stopped by after not reading anything’s bag for a bit! As always, still a fan of your style. I think of you and Jill’s struggles from time to time, and hope that y’all are both doing the best as possible, under the circumstances.
Anyway, glad you’re still writing!
The Viking
Viking — Happy to see you’re still around!! Thank you for your kind wishes.
My most recent post answers some of your question. As of this moment in time, we’re doing well enough, just a long bumpy road to get here. (Jill’s health problems are chronic and unsolvable, essentially.)
At least auto correct didn’t mess it up too much!