Another online advertiser that’s been around for years has never changed one highly offensive paragraph on their site. They offered me a free ad a long time ago but when I read through their site, I decided they weren’t for me. They’re still in business, so they must be doing something right. I’ve just wanted to write about this one for a few years.

Though they give some basic common-sense advice to potential advertisers, they offer to re-write your ad to appeal to “upscale clientele”. Fair enough. But do “upscale” clients visit this site? I question this because…they immediately follow the mini-advertising lesson with making sure a girl understands to price herself “reasonably” because clients aren’t going to pay good money to take her out on (movie, yachting, dinner, etc.) dates if she expects to be well-compensated for every hour even if she doesn’t “have to take her clothes off.” They think an escort should only charge a lot per hour if she’s entertaining a bachelor party of 30+ guys (and I guess a smaller bachelor party doesn’t count). Which every escort I know does every weekend (rolling my eyes).

Though I totally agree the girls who put up with bachelor parties have every right to charge more for the hassle, it’s hard to make that argument in an ad or website without implying she’s selling sex for money. Those who do usually sound like they’re charging money for sex, which is illegal in the US. (Advertising bachelor party shows are a different concept than doing bachelor parties.)

Right after this lesson in what they think clients are really paying for — gang-bangs, not companionship — they tell a girl to not imply offers of sexual services for money in her ads — like using Greek as a code word, because she could end up arrested. Yes, that is true. But…

Gotta wonder if newbie advertisers looking for advertising/marketing advice suffer conceptual whiplash after reading through this page. Clearly, the people (probably men) running this site think their advertisers are only exchanging sex for money. They’re not alone in that opinion and that’s not what bothers me.

It’s the very misguided attempt at “helping” a newbie that’s so dangerous. They’re not doing her any favors. Good lord, they make it sound like doing huge bachelor party gang-bangs is de rigueur for an escort — which it is certainly not. And it makes her think she needs to consult them and their beliefs before setting her rates — which she does not (consulting her monthly bills is the smarter place to start).

Once again, someone is attempting to put unnecessary control on an independent escort. If they took out the rates/bachelor party paragraph, they’d actually have a perfectly useful and sensible advertising/marketing advice page.

But…if you do think you’re paying for the pussy, then understand the pussy does not belong to you and she who owns it makes the rules.

8 thoughts on “what are you really paying for? 2

  1. I think some of these online advertisers might mean well when giving advice whether it is good or bad. But I agree some of them try to play “God” which is very wrong. But that goes for any business where advertising is important and there is an advertiser who has a virtual monopoly. For instance back in the days and even to some extent today the Yellow Pages with all their rules and high fees.

    Have you ever considered starting a adult advertising website? You seem like a fair person who would look out for the interests of the escorts as well as the clients. You could make nice money too but I have a gut feeling you would not put making money before your principles which would be great.

  2. I can see some of their points, having played mostly at mid-range as opposed to high-end.

    A lot of people love company, dinner dates, overnights, travel but cannot fit in their budget to pay more than a certain total amount for the date. So I can see the logic of heavy discounting for time amounts after the first 1,1.5 or 2 hours for a mid-range escort. She would still get paid way more than most conventional jobs.
    But I never thought it could look incriminating…

    It also sounds like the rest of their advice comes across very mixed as well.

  3. Setting rules and boundaries like that site does makes them sound more like a half-assed escort agency than an advertising site for independents. Maybe that’s their aim. If they can get enough providers to jump through their hoops, they can be an agency without doing all that boring paperwork or setting up in-calls, etc. etc.

  4. Chris,

    I haven’t run across advertisers playing God quite so much in the mainstream world — it seems more rampant in the adult world. Most of my business experience is here though.

    No, I have NO DESIRE for the headaches of managing an advertising mall! No no no!! This isn’t me whining from the sidelines — most advertisers get it right and some are terrific. The ones who aren’t stick out to me, though.


    Rates are something an escort needs to figure out based on a number of factors. What SOMEONE ELSE thinks of her job is NOT one of the factors.

    And it’s a learning lab for some — if her rates are too high, she might need to adjust. If they’re too low and she isn’t paying her bills — she might need to adjust. But ultimately — she can charge whatever she wants. The market will ignore her or not.

    Everything in the US looks incriminating. Sigh. It has to be approached that way, unfortunately. Which is a handicap to those girls who would prefer to charge for sex acts.


    Didn’t think about that! I am very sure that they’re happy to tell girls who write in what they think they sould charge. I’ve seen men on boards do this. It’s very very wrong.

    While I might only want to pay 10EUR for lunch out here, plenty of people pay 20-40EUR for lunch — so why would a restaurant consult with me or take my word as gospel? I could ruin their business for them if 10EUR lunches don’t pay their overhead.


  5. Maybe you don’t want to run an ad mall, but it’d sure be nice if there were an amalgamation of providers/former providers who offered a range of services for escorts, new and established.

  6. Alexa,

    A professional association of professional service providers? That’s an idea! One-stop shopping for everyone and here’s a place where a Code of Ethics would really have to count.

    Hmm….wow. I could really get behind something like that. Brilliant idea!


  7. Amanda are you going to be in Las Vegas Sept 9th.? I sent you an email on friday. I don’t know if you had a chance to see it. The title is Update – 7/20/09.

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